What to do if one distruptively needs a disruptive™ solution for semi-mutual non-exclusive recursion for an enterprise multi-cloud ready Hello™ World™ deployment? This question is entirely OS agnostic, but HR insists on using the IBM™ Q™ technology stack to improve Lock-Free Incremental Monetary Transfer™ from investor's bank account to HR's bank account.

Problem: Implement extremelly-parallelized fixed-point functor asynchronous lock-free Hello™ World™-ready algorithm for quick recursive (using prepropomorphic subroutine) indexing of Hello™ World™ in-memory columnar sharded database?

Issue: Our Enterprise™ implementation is too efficient and we need to Bullshit™ investors and pretend like we need more moneys for servers!!!!!!111

Proposed Solution: Force Enterprise™ non-disruptive lock-free in-memory inbred columnar key-value store to be only accessible via a fax machine™